“I was submitted to a sexist postgraduate course’

Luciano Hack was the first in the family to learn that his brother, 40-year-old filmmaker Fernando Grosten, was gay. The news, which he told himself in 1999, left the presenter, who was 28 years old, in “shock”. This episode is told in detail in the recently released book Door to Door, which Hack wrote during the pandemic. “I’m gay,” said my only brother Fernando, the presenter begins an entire chapter devoted to this topic.

When Fernando, who was twenty, located him and said, ‘Look, I’m gay,’ this is my life, this is not a choice, this is my being, this is me, I said, ‘Okay, but at first, I was a little shocked – for reasons It’s about the dull, stupid, and almost inhuman way the world enforces codes of conduct, but also because you want the life of someone you love to be a smooth path, with no potholes and a little bit of twisting. (…) In the world we live in, (…) although this is changing, being gay still unfortunately means facing a heavy dose of prejudice,” admits the new host of “Domingão” in the book.

In the emotional story full of life lessons, Luciano opens his heart and even admits he had prejudices.

“The ‘liberation’ began that day when Fernando showed me that we are neither the same nor as close as I imagined. (…) Today, seeing the number of years and years in which I have been subjected to a kind of post-existence graduation – which has devastated and destroyed my generation and so many others – has made me Unable to see the prejudices I thought, said, and did, and worse, the important things I stopped thinking, saying, and doing. (…) Today I know I too was afraid to face my own prejudices.”

Luciano Hack’s mother tells of her reaction after the director’s son was found to be gay: ‘I cried and got scared’

Stupidly, I felt I had a certain obligation to reproduce the toxicities I absorbed with him in the name of manliness, from a humiliating “imitation” that had generated large numbers of traumatized, at least sexually confused men. (…) given the burden of sexual cues and hatred The homosexuality that Brazilian society had given me—and the prejudice and suffering I imagined it would bring to Fernando and my family—my first feeling, in fact, was the loss of ground.A clash between all that had taken hold within me, the result of what is now called structural masculinity, and my attempt to understand and process new information and form a new consciousness ‘, he explains.

The brother in the book still recounts the moment he made the revelation: “Luciano lost ground, but his immediate instinct was to welcome. Protect. I remember the first thing he did was to give me his hand, hug me, and say that we were together. I was looking for acceptance.”

Luciano Hack explains that he’s always had an affair, love, and mutual admiration with Fernando, and tells us how proud he is of his brother and how much he helped the director, who is ten years his junior, understand him. The world of LGBTQIA+.

“It wasn’t a few times that my brother and I would reconsider our pain and our emotions about it. So many conversations and some discussions. (…) Getting to this point of learning wasn’t easy. (…) There were years of meetings and disagreements , and some quarrels and explosive reactions on both sides. I think it is important to re-emphasize this, to make it clear that our family life is far from a text for a margarine declaration. (…) That is why I expose here, without fear, the intimate bowels of our family (…) …) because I believe that this story somehow contributes to making this world a better place.”