The two doctors – played by Kate McKinnon and Heidi Gardner – were interviewed by Beck Bennett Wolf Blitzer, who has been described as “an indoor man with a name for the outdoors,” according to a variety show on NBC.
“We’re doing this vaccine in the WWII style. We’ve got England going first,” said Fauci McKinnon. “Tom Hanks will make 10 movies on this topic and when it’s over you will be able to kiss any nurse you want.”
Blitzer asked Bennett who would get the first vaccine in the United States.
Fauci McKinnon said, “Okay, here’s how we’re going to do it. First of all, the health care workers, Mac Stemies and McDreams, what have you got?”
Then Gardner Brix said the vaccine would pass to “anyone named Mildred.”
As MacKinnon spoke, he was hit in the face by a bra.
“I’m sorry, Dr. Fauci. Has someone thrown a bra on your face?” Blitzer asked Bennett.
Fauci explained that this happens to him a lot now.
He said, “Throughout it all, I was the only one who told the facts, so I liked some people.” They say things like, “Can you be my face mask?”
Gardner Brix said the vaccine distribution will vary from state to state.
“The North Carolina vaccine will depend on vinegar, while the South Carolina vaccine will rely on mustard,” she said. “In New York, the pollen pot would be very fluffy from underneath while in Chicago, it would be a deeper dish.”
For McKinnon’s Fauci, the doctor had one hope.
“If enough Americans get this vaccine, they’ll forget who I am,” Fauci said. “This is my goal: not to recognize any name with Americans. It means that I did my job well.”
Then the two fake doctors got together to get the show’s opening phrase, “Live … from New York! It’s Saturday night!”