Luciana Vendramini recalls her life with OCD: ‘Deep hole’

After a few years away from recordings, making her punctual appearances on TV, they came to me for an interview and asked why I was missing out. At that time, I thought: “Guys, what am I going to say? That I was in Tibet?”.

I lost everything – work, health, weight. The only thing I had to say was the truth. And I said, “I had OCD.”

It had a huge impact because, like me, no one really knows what OCD is.

From there, my mom’s life got crazy. They found her number in the phone book and kept calling asking for help, referring doctors. “I have, and I have my son, and my husband has.”

At work, I went through a lot of stigma and prejudice.

I felt this vibration in people: “Oh, you’re going to do a lot of work.” Just because I’ve talked publicly about mental health. But I’ve never done anything in my life, and I’ve never raised my voice with anyone. At work, I am flawless. And I’ve seen a lot of people make a scene behind the scenes without ever getting sick.

I wish I had worked more in that time – it wasn’t really frustrating, but I feel like five wasted professionally.

At the same time, I understand that this is the path that life must take. I didn’t want to experience any of this of course, but it did. do what?

I have a book out there from 2010 that talks about OCD the way I really wanted to find it out there and I didn’t. At the time, I didn’t want to release him because I was afraid of stigma.

Everyone just wanted to talk about it, and no one wanted to know what I was doing – the gameplay, the serial, a novel. you bothered me. But today I understand that, in fact, there is a demand for the topic precisely because almost no one talks about it. People want to read, introduce themselves, and understand the problem.

Today I take a low dose of medication and follow up with a psychiatrist. Just. And I live deeply, because one of the good things in everyday life was to find life again – lunch with my parents, for example, being able to go out without fear, and eat with pleasure.

Since 2003, in fact, when I started treating myself for real, I’m a different person. I don’t panic, I don’t feel anything.

If I see a crooked picture, I won’t change it, it doesn’t affect me, it doesn’t motivate me. Just like a bad idea, a feeling worry, which I still have, of course, does not affect me, do not take me out of appointments. The difference is impressive.

You were harsh with me. The taboo, the stigma, made me take too long to treat myself. But I became a castle again.